Human Trafficking in Indonesia

I need to tell you about something that's going on in Indonesia that I haven't talked about a lot in this blog, but that is an unspoken reality for a lot of desperate Indonesians.

I've heard personal stories, and I've read stories on BBC.

The personal story I heard was in Lombok, two islands east of Java. The man I was talking to was the driver of a public van/bus my sister, friend, and I were riding. As usual I asked him about his family, his job, his story. I wasn't ready to hear his story, even though I should have been. I'd read about human trafficking and even started a chapter of the International Justice Mission on my campus (an organization that addresses justice issues such as trafficking). But there's something about hearing a personal story of injustice that truly awakens the reality to you, regardless of how many reports you've read and numbers you've seen.

Stories make a difference.

He told me he was a widower with two little kids. His wife's stomach became big and they thought she was pregnant but it was something else. She died from "water in her stomach" and 2 months after her death he left his little kids with his family and went to work in Saudi Arabia for two years. The kids needed food and they were approaching school age. Education here isn't free. He lasted only a year because the abuse was so intense the the pay so little that he escaped and came back to Indonesia with nothing but the clothes on his back. He told me some people get their lips cut off, because their bosses are mad that they can't speak Arabic. Now he works as a van driver and doesn't make enough to put his kids through school.

There are several things wrong with this picture. First, the health care system that made it difficult for his wife to go to the hospital before it was too late. Second, the fact that school is not free. Third, immigration services out of Indonesia didn't protect him when we went to work in Saudi Arabia. I want to address the third issue. Migration isn't the problem. People often migrate with no trouble. It can be beneficial for both the sending country and the receiving country. There are about one million Indonesian migrant workers in the Middle East. The problem is the lack of protection for the workers.

In November there was the story about the Indonesian maid whose body was found dumped in the street. In addition to gashes on her face there were cuts to her lips, which makes me think that she may have been punished for not speaking Arabic like the man I met on Lombok said.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-11795356

Last month there was the story about the Indonesian employee who went to the hospital severely beaten and near death. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-12151454

Her story ends differently.

She survived and amazingly her employer was "convicted under a new royal decree against human trafficking" and is now in jail for abusing Sumiati.

I ranted about it during college and I'll say it again. Human trafficking is real and it's a problem. Speaking out against it and sticking the stories and the statistics in the face of governments makes a difference. Telling people's stories makes a difference. Pushing for new laws makes a difference. There are people today living in slavery. Desperate conditions make them take risky jobs that land them in positions they can't escape from. Either work toward improving their initial conditions, work toward getting them out of the place of slavery that they are in, or work toward letting the world know that slavery like this happens, and it's not ok.

A better world is possible, but it's not going to happen with us sitting on our bums.

And in case you think this is a third world problem, look up human trafficking statistics for the US. You who are in bordering states especially (ie, Arizona....) The numbers are scary. Just because you can't see them doesn't mean they aren't there. There are chains to break, work towards breaking them.

Email me if you have an interest in the anti-trafficking movement in the US.

Christmas, 2011, life update

As I was browsing some friends' blogs and wondering what I should blog about myself since it's been about two weeks since my last post, I came across the blog of a co-volunteerer here in Indonesia and she blew anything I was thinking might be interesting to blog about right out of the water. She had dengue fever over the new year! And she very creatively described her symptoms and feelings to the point where I started feeling like maybe I might have dengue too. But no, I'm really feeling completely healthy (other than the 9 mosquito bites I somehow acquired overnight) and feeling a bit lame because I have no awesome dengue fever story to blog about. Although.. That's actually a blessing... I've been pretty sicky in the past four months so to be able to blog that I am healthy is actually news.

I'll update you on how life has been since my last post on the 20th. Christmas was interesting and not what I'm used to. Big surprise, right? I'm in a developing country. I'm in Asia, a world away physically and culturally from the US. But it still takes me off guard sometimes, that not everyone does what I think everyone should do on days like Christmas. There's no universal anything. What I mean by that is that eating and breathing is about the only thing I find in common with culture and life here and that in the states. While we know that life in other countries is different, nothing can prepare us for how different it can be. All these things in our life in our own culture that are a given... From having four seasons to gifts on Christmas to family meals and quoting sources on our university papers... Are simply not a given everywhere and that still takes me off guard. First I'm confused, like maybe I missed something. Then when it settles in that this is how life is here then I find myself getting resentful to the culture, then it's a battle to convince myself that it's ok and that they're not missing out on anything fundamental to life by not giving gifts on Christmas or eating as a family or any of those other things that I grew up thinking the whole world did.

I went to a couple Christmas services before Christmas. One was here in Kudus and the other in Semarang. (None were in my church. My church is very small and in a village.)

They were pretty westernish, though still different than my church back in the US. For example for the service in Kudus they hired three famous people to entertain. Famous as in, winner of Indonesian Idol... It was nuts because everyone in the audience was going crazy and obviously in awe over them while to Joel and I they looked like any other Indonesian... Just goes to emphasize that we as a collective society MAKE people famous. They don't naturally glow famousosity and fill everyone around them with fuzzy feelings of awe and admiration. We control who we make famous and it shows something about our culture, who we give famousness to. Anyways, that was a bit strange to me, to have pop stars as entertainers but then it would probably be strange to the people here if I told them that I never go to church on Christmas day and rarely on Christmas eve. I went to two services on Christmas eve and one on Christmas day here. I find that for Christians here, life revolves around the church. Your friends are mostly from there, you're there at least three times a week and every holiday, your outings are mainly organized through the church.. In the US I had a huge life outside of my friends and family at church. It was more than just a Sunday thing, but my life was definitely not as involved in the church as it is here. Maybe it's because this country is like 95% Muslim. I think of doing church as hanging out with people who love Jesus, and this is done in a lot of places in the States, because you can find Jesus lovers outside of your church. But here, you don't find that.

We did have a Christmas tree though.

I also baked Christmas cookies for my family and school.

But other than that and a few Christmas programs (and interestingly, they are still happening. I just got an invitation to a Christmas party on January 14th. Crazy! In the US Christmas parties really can't happen after the new year and ideally should happen between the 15th and the 24th of December.) Christmas was just like any other day. But a bit slower. I slept a lot. And then read the Women's Day and Real Simple magazines my mum sent me. I love American magazines here for some reason. I've ripped out several pretty pages and stuck them on my wall. I think they just feel like home to me. I stare at every page. Even the advertisements. I suck up all the Americanness out of them that I can. Sounds pathetic. I am so American! I don't mind it so much though, because yes I'm American but I'm challenging myself and my American ways by living in Indonesia for a year. Every person comes from somewhere and is saturated with that place's good and bad. When an Indonesian goes to America I'm sure they feel much more Indo then when they were here. I bet they go strait to a store and buy a rice maker and relish in the semi-Indo-like taste of ramen noodles. And that's ok. We're all from somewhere and we become so much more from that somewhere when we leave it. And we tend to embrace it more when we're gone from home. I push myself away from being American when I'm in Phoenix, but then it totally comes out when I'm here. From obsessive and picky coffee drinking to movie watching and a love for sleep, milk drinking, and cereal eating, I'm so American and I don't care who knows it. But other than for breakfast I love the food here and I love the greeness, and I find the people unjudging of my Americanness and open to get to know me. I appreciate that. I love their Indonesian-ness as strange and different as I find it sometimes, I'm glad to get to know it. It grows me in patience and open mindedness.

Shoot, another long blog post. I wonder how many people make it two paragraphs in and stop reading. I should really edit it and take out some of the rantings, but sometimes I think the rants have more substance than talking about my activities and schedules.

That said, I do do more here than just think and rant in my head. For example, on the 27th my friend living in the Philippines working with the Peace Corps came to visit me, and then on the 29th my sister did. What a weird experience seeing them here, so far away from the world I know them from. I was glad for them to see my life and my reality here, to hear their thoughts on the place and the people and to hear about their life and what is going on back in the US and their communities. They also kicked me in the butt- Jerica is doing development work and it's pretty hard core and she's working hard at it, harder than I am and it motivated me to seize these next few months and do as much in them as I can. My sister is a medical doctor doing her residency and works 90+ hours a week. That number in itself is a kick in the butt, as I sleep 9 hours a night on average and usually never work more than 35 hours at the school I'm at. Work is relative though. I feel like I'm always working here. Except when I'm in my room, I'm engaging this culture and my community and working through cultural differences and learning and being stimulated in a hundred ways, learning more of the language and sharing my story and hearing stories and teaching English and all of that in a way is my work here. Work isn't just at the school where I teach. My assignment here is to make life within a community, to engage them and to create relationships that will lead to eventual projects and development work. I feel like last year was largely the relationship creating part and now is the projects part.

We'll see. People aren't projects though, and I keep that in mind.

Pics from my sister's and Jerica's time here are soon to come, though most of you who read this are my friends on facebook so you can just see them there.

Birthday Thoughts

I'll start out by saying my birthday here was great. More people than I could have thought remembered, and I felt fully loved. Thanks to everyone who made it special.. Being woken up by singing, two birthday cakes, many text messages, many wall posts, and a skype date home. Who could ask for more?

Birthdays are days to feel loved. And usually, at least for me, it's a day to reflect on life and it's progression. I'm 24, and that's pretty young by most standards. That said, it's a year more than 23, and it's 10 years older than 14. I am getting older. Every one is, and it makes you think about how fast life happens.

I've never been afraid of death and I didn't understand why people would be. It's a moment of pain and then that's it. It's not like dying (usually) takes a really long time. There are some injuries that are more painful than some deaths. But anymore I don't think that's what people mean by saying they're afraid of death. I think fear of death goes beyond the fear of pain involved with the finishing of life. I think it's the not existing that gets to people. No one cheats death forever, and while there is technology for so much now days, we still have not invented something that will give us eternal life on earth. It's the inevitability of the day that we will finish actively effecting the world. Even for religious people who have strong beliefs about the afterlife, there's no experiencing it before it happens. There are ideas and there are words in sacred texts and there are stories of people who are dead for moments but return, but those are so subjective. We can't put our hand through to death and bring it back and see what it looks like. And we can't reach our hand into death and pull out ones who have gone before us. There's no going and coming. There's only going. And there's no sending reports back to people. Our consciously effecting the world is finished.

Even if you are not a deep thinker, not very philosophical, not into morbidity.. You have thought about it. Everyone has.

One side comment. My sister died 7 years ago, and this does effect my view on the end of life as we know it. This is from a poem by John White Chadwick.

"More home-like feels the vast unkown,

Since they have entered there;

To follow them were not so hard,

Wherever they may fare."

The thought of death is easier when someone that you love a lot has passed through before you.

That said, it's still hard. And there's no way out of it but accept it. Cause living a life in constant fear of it's ending is no way to live. It's a life of constant death.

But.

Living life as if there was always a tomorrow is no way to live either. Because then you get to the end and you're like, "Wait, what?! It's done?! I'm not ready!" How awful and devastating that thought is. I think the right balance is keeping in mind how old you are. Living so that your life is full whatever age you are: keeping your relationships strong, letting go of those relationships that are empty and not life-giving to either of you, being at peace with God, doing those things you love without fear. And also, living so that your future, your next year, will be better. Doing a bit of planning. Improving yourself, gaining experience that you can add on to the next year, and make your next 5 years more full.

The best thing would be to get to the end of your life, be on your death bed, and be able to say "Wow, what a life! I'm so tired! I'm ready to go. A full life that will keep effecting the world for years to come. Kids that will contribute positively to the world. People who will miss me and feel there is a hole in the world because I'm gone. A community that is changed. People who love God more because I affected their lives. Full." To be ready to let our life speak for itself without our bodies to speak for it. What I mean is, our lives will echo once we're gone, and to let that echoing start. To be ready...

I realize that this post is a bit of a downer, but that's life for you. There's a time to be very present in the moment and be lost in the activity around you, and there is a time to step back and be a bit more philosophical and check and make sure that in those moments of being present and engaged in the activities of the day that you're living out your philosophy of life that you develop when you're thinking your deeper thoughts.

I think to be ready for death also involves being at peace with God.

My faith is only legit BECAUSE I will die. It would be stupid to be a Christian if we lived forever.

"If for this life only we have hoped in Christ, we are all people most to be pitied."

But..

"But in fact, Christ has been raised from the dead, the first fruits of those who have died. For since death came through a human being, the resurrection of the dead has also come through a human being; for as all die in Adam, so all will be made alive in Christ."

I Corinthians 15

So yeah. Anyways regardless of religion we don't know exactly what it's going to be like over there. On the "other side". Such an image of crossing over, and the bridge only goes one way!

But I like the end of Chadwick's poem. It's honest about the fact that we know nothing about the next life, except one thing.

"They cannot be where God is not,

On any sea or shore."

I know nothing about what's next after death. Except that I will be with God. And whatever that looks like, whatever "sea or shore", He can worry about. I'm satisfied knowing wherever I will be, God will be there. Created meets Creator and never looks back.

Christmas.

I bought an oven. Basically it's a tin box that sits on top of the stove, but I have some great Christmas-cookie-expectations for it.

Except for the occasional memory that hits me about Christmases at home, I'm really doing ok being here for the Holidays.

But I'm not passing over the season. I'm definitely embracing it. I play Christmas music on itunes a lot, and have started plucking them out on the guitar. This years song of obsession is "It's Christmas" by Coconut Records. Something about it's 70's music feel, it's simplicity.. I play it constantly. Also, Zooey Deschanel's "Baby It's Cold Outside"... I just love her voice. So classic.

I haven't understood yet what Indonesian Christians do for Christmas yet. My family has yet to set up a Christmas tree or any decorations at all, for that matter. It may have to do with the fact that my host mom had a bad seizure a couple of weeks ago and has been going to the hospital for therapy every other day since. Some of the neighbors in the hood have Christmas trees up. They're little though, and there are only about 3 neighbors in the area that are Christians, so it's not like the place is lit up.

I've been to two church Christmas celebrations. Well, one of them was a church birthday with some Christmas songs thrown in. The other was in Semarang and the church group took a bus from Kudus and met up with a church there. It was like a Christmas service would be in the US, with a candle lighting, but then there were also some non-church songs which I thought was interesting. Not bad, just interesting. Like "Oh Christmas Tree" and some Santa songs. It didn't make me homesick like I thought it would. Maybe because a fellow SALTer showed up to the event and we sat together and we were able to snicker and exchange observations.

Homesickness hits me at weird times. Once in October I was at a church play and they played a praise song in English and I lost it. Just started crying. I was alone in a big congregation and didn't have anyone I knew sitting with me. Maybe that was it. Other than that, there have been no times of pit-of-the-stomach homesickness. Just, missings.

Sometimes, to be honest, I miss the food from home more than the people.

There, I said it.

But I do miss the people too.

My Christmas plans are as follows:

-Bake Christmas cookies and not burn down the house (having the cookies actually turn out and not burn would be an added bonus. Low expectations is the way to go.)

- My mother sent me some Christmas decorations and I have put them up. They include a gold glitter star, a huge plastic door hanging, and window clings. The tacky (ok Mom, it IS tacky and you know it. I do love it though, and I play the little music and the flashy lights at least once a day.) door hanging is up (It's a full length plastic sheet with a manger scene and some lights that blink and sing when you press a button) and the gold star in on my computer desk. The clings are yet to be put up.

- On the 20th I will take Christmas cookies to the school for teachers and students. This will serve two purposes: The 20th is my Birthday, and it is customary here for people to treat others on their birthday, and I want to share with the school my culture and part of that is Christmas and it's cookies.

-On the 22nd I will travel to Salatiga for the annual office Christmas party. Cookie decorations, a dinner, and a white elephant gift exchange will be involved.

The next day I will either stay in Salatiga and do some more baking and festiviting or I will head to Semarang and see some of the Christmas lights at the mall there. And buy a peppermint mocha from Starbucks.

-I will spend the 25th at my host families home in Kudus. There are several Christmas day church services I will probably attend. I may or may not be in one of them. Communication here is weird. Because it just doesn't happen sometimes. So sometimes you just have to go with it. Better that than get your panties all up in a ball and try to get information that will just change in the next couple of days anyway, which leads to a lot of frustration and unnecessary mental stress.

-Then Jerica and Amanda arrive the 28th and 29th and we head for a week of discovering and adventuring and relaxing on Lombok, the island next to Bali.

I'm excited for these things.

But mostly I'm really, really thankful for God-incarnate, Jesus. Christmas is critical to the Christian belief. God becoming man, coming to the earth to teach us how to live and to die so that we can be with him after we leave the earth. I can't find that kind of beauty and love in any other religion. It wins me over to the religion of Jesus.

Indo Wedding

Most of my students are between the ages of 18 and 23 but I'm sure this kid sitting in front of me is at most 16. But no, she's 18, and she just told me she is getting married.

Pang in the stomach. But you're so young! She's cute and she giggles behind her hand. Here in Indonesia it's rude for a girl to show too much teeth when she laughs, so the girls are always laughing behind their hands. This is a little bit sad to me because I love seeing a huge smile and to think it's rude is just so.... culturally different. That's all it is. You know, living in another culture for 3 months has shown me really just how culturally prideful I am and I've had to check myself in the way I describe some of the aspects of culture that clash with my own. Some differences in culture are soft and aside from a "Oh, well that's interesting!" they're not too mind blowing but some cultural differences are really hard for me to not judge. Like getting married young.

I want to say that there's no way it can be alright and be a good thing for anyone, but I can't say say that. To see things without passing judgement is so hard, but it's a good lesson in grace and learning. I'm learning about a culture and giving it grace when it offends my own culture. And different is not bad. Different is interesting and different is challenging. It's ok, and I'm learning to embrace it.

But A.'s just so young and she's my student.... Not just a stranger pictured in the National Geographic or a population statistic or a vague idea in a Cross Cultural Understanding class... And here she is giving me a wedding invitation, giggling. Her light blue head scarf complements her dark features and her eyes are so bright.. How can I say no?! She looks so happy- of course I'll go. But I do express to her that I think that she's a very young girl to be getting married. S., our mutual friend sitting next to her across my desk, explains that in the villages people tend to get married younger. Well that makes sense, I've read that places. But her? Couldn't she break the trend? I ask her if she'll continue studying in the university after her marriage. Of course! And she has. I've seen her several times in my classroom since her wedding and not only is she present but she radiates happiness. How can I in turn not be happy for her? She's a rock star. Getting married young but staying in school, and based on her mega intelligent questions in class, she is still learning just as much as before.

I've been to a wedding in Indonesia before but I didn't know who was getting married and I just came, took a picture with the bride, eat a lot of delicious food, and left. This wedding was totally different- I got behind the scenes access and they let me take pictures even though I broke the rules and took some during the ceremony. It was amazing, and such a unique experience.

I arrive early- I think it was 7am. S and I eat some rice treats and drank a bottle of tea while we waited inside, sitting alone on the colorful carpet in the living room area of the house. Soon I am ushered in and got to see A. getting ready. She tells me she's been up since 5am getting ready. The evening before she sent me a text explaining that she was in the 3rd phase of a traditional, day-before-the-wedding cleansing process. I can hardly recognize her now! Her face is powdered and heavily made up. She's beautiful though, see for yourself.

After I snap a few shots and talk to her some I leave the tiny bedroom and sit outside with her classmates in a small area between the front living room and the kitchen. We eat Soto and talk about school. Many of them have been in a class of mine but I can't remember their names. We get re-introduced but my mind wanders and I forget their names again in seconds. All the names sound the same, and I can only say that because they say the same thing about American names.

She comes out and hangs out with us for a bit. "Hangs out" is not quite right.. She sits stiffly on a plastic chair and doesn't move a muscle because her head piece is pinching her face and she has a delicate flower sash draped across her that could fall off in a second. Her shiny silver head piece starts falling out so we have to readjust it. She's hungry, so a friend spoon feeds her some Soto. It dribbles down her chin and we scramble crazily to not let it mess up her make up. Finally it's action time and her classmates and I huddle in the middle room while she, her father, her fiance, and some religious and government men sit in the front living room. The ceremony begins. There are some prayers that happen between the legal proceedings and while I don't know what all is going on, A and her fiance are signing papers and the main man preceding over the ceremony explains to them their legal rights and roles. I'm still peeking from the middle room, not sure if it's proper for me to go into the other room or not. This is when I get in trouble for taking pictures at the wrong time.

After this ceremony A changes her clothes and her new husband disappears to his house. The wedding is happening at her house. She sits outside in a decorated wooden seat on a platform with a heavily flowered background as we all sit on plastic chairs around tables of food and glass bottles of tea. The MC jokes around with the guests and we wait for the husband to arrive. When he does, a long and traditional ceremony takes place where different symbolic actions happen such as the bride and groom bowing at each set of their parents, the husband stepping on an egg and A cleaning his feet, money is transferred somewhere along the way, all the while the MC is speaking in very traditional Javanese explaining what is going on (later I find out almost no one knows what he is saying because there are several levels of Javanese and he's speaking the one least people know. I'm told this happens at every wedding.)

Finally it's picture time and after several pictures with A, her husband, and then classmates, I take off with S. In total I was here about 4 hours I believe. What an experience... I loved being a part of A's day and I'm glad she's still coming to school and this is not the end of her life- it's just another fase in it. We're having breakfast next Thursday and I'm excited to hear about how she's doing.

Resume

Every few months I have a mini break down where I realize that I cannot save the whole world right now, nor will I ever be able to save the whole world, and that the burden I put on myself to create the perfect resume that will land me the job where by the age of 27 I am saving the whole world from my desk with a view of the Empire State Building or the Capitol Building with a gourmet late by my side and an income exceeding 40 grand a year... Who am I kidding? Heck, now that I think about it is that even what I really want....

It's quite a load and I begin to see things as "What will this look like on my resume?" instead of "What does this add to my life?".

Resumes don't have anyone's name on it but your own. It doesn't reflect your quality of life. It reflects your academic and work achievements and attempts to give a possible future employer an idea about your ability to successfully fullfil job requirements. No one puts on their resume that they have a healthy body, a healthy mind, a good community of friends and peers who hold them accountable to be the best version of themselves.. A resume doesn't mention the quality of your relationship with your family or your outlook on life- if you are able to appreciate the small things and understand the meaning of living a full life. It doesn't mention if you are at peace with the Creator of the universe and have the right perspective about making a broken world less broken with the creativity and uniqueness you were made with.

I know these things are so much more important than what is written on a resume, but sometimes I get caught up in the rat race of the world and the bad economy and lack of jobs and the prospect of being out there in the job market again in about 7 months just gives me a headache and a heartache and I wonder if I have what it takes to make it. And then that brings me to think.... What does it mean to "make it"? What is dying well? One thing that still strikes me when I think about it, is that we are all going to die one day. From famous TV actors, to presidents, to multi millionaires.. Their fate and my fate is no different than absolutely anyone elses in this world. We all have one finite life to be lived, and none of us can get away from the question "What does it mean to make it?" What am I living about?

Sometimes I feel panicky when I think that maybe I will die not being known very well in any area of work.... In development or politics or writing or theology... That I will not have made a mark in any of these and that 2 generations after my death maybe a handful of people will know my name. I dont know though.. Because then I think- better to be known while I am alive, then work all my life and neglect relationships so I can be known after I die. Not that I think that anyone who has ever made a mark in the work world has neglected their relationships. I'm just saying that if the stress of making my resume better is putting stress on my relationships, it's not worth it. Let it go. Be where you are and do what you need to do to take care of your mind, soul, spirit and relationships where you are, and think about your resume later.

The world is not meant to be carried on a single pair of shoulders and I think when it does it's really a shame and ignores that fact that I'm part of a bigger humanity. We're not in this alone, and no one steals the show, because no one lives forever. Death means that our role in this world ends, and hopefully we will have done something to bring peace and redemption to the broken areas in us, around us, and between us.

I can deal with that. Since I have the bigger picture about life after death, there's nothing in that last paragraph that I can't live with. I have a hope in humanity (because I have a hope in the One who became human and by redeeming us, showed us how to live and how to work to redeem the world around us) and I have hope in the role of an afterlife that is just as lively and legit as life on earth.

So now that the world is off my shoulders, I see it was never meant to be there anyways. I will have an "Ugh life is too big for me, this burden is too heavy!" moment again in a few months but hopefully truth will hit me over the head again and I will be able to refocus before going insane.

That said, I need to get out of my head and out of the open Word document entitled "Resume 2010" and engage these people around me, starting with creating a power point for the Writers Forum at the university tomorrow and then visiting the work girls at the store next door. And write some emails to some people I miss a lot back at home. :) And make some tear-out snow flakes for my room. I love Christmas time and I don't care if it's 110 degrees outside, it's going to look like Christmas in here.!!

Update on life

I realize it's been a while since my last blog entry and it's not because I haven't been doing anything worth blogging about. Often I'll be engaging in an awesome, unique activity and think, I so need to blog about this later! But when your internet is iffy and everyday you have those, "I need to blog this!" moments, time gets away from you and before you know it it would take 15 blog posts to relay your crazy stories.

I haven't been doing a very good job of personal journaling either which I'm mad about. Sometimes life's too busy and I'm too tired to go through the motions of remembering and writing.

This month of November has been hot. Maybe it's because at the moment I'm sitting in my underwear with a fan pointed blowing toward me and I'm still sweating, but I do feel like this month has been warmer than months past. I shower in the morning, shower right as soon as I get back from school, and usually shower right before bed if I have the energy.

In the beginning of this month we had MCC Indonesia team meetings in Bandungan. That's near Salatiga (where the MCC office is and where we had language training) and much higher than Kudus so it was colder. Actually, it was legit cold. I loved it. It was a great reminder that it's cold back in the US now too. It felt right. Team meetings were so great.. It had only been 2 and a half weeks since we started at our assignments but it was still good to be back with the office people from Salatiga and the other SALTers. I miss native English speakers and people who are accustomed to my culture when I'm in Kudus. I miss like minded people who understand the meaning of my being here and understand who MCC is and why I am here. The greater goal and vision. It was a crazy team meetings because of the natural disasters that had hit and were hitting Indonesia. The tsunami and earthquakes off the coast of Sumatra and the floods in Papua were over, but there were still relief efforts happening to address them. And then the Merapi eruption was still going on and people were being evacuated and then shuffled around as the danger distance increased around the volcano, so Jeanne, MCC Indonesia director, was both leading team meetings and trying to coordinate and work with MDS (Mennonite Disaster Services) to address the volcano craziness. It was great for me, actually, to see her "in action". I got to hear and see what MCC is about. We made lists and talked and our voices (even us one year SALTers) were listened to. I definitely feel a part of MCC Indonesia and appreciate that I am here not on my own but a part of a bigger effort to serve this country. We watched some good documentaries (ok, I slept through half of one but it started at like 8:30pm and we had had a pretty early morning and a full day that day so don't judge), eat some good food (some American chocolates, pretzels, and Karen even brought candy corn!!!!), had good discussions on the vision of MCC Indonesia, were updated on MCC's response to the natural disasters, talked about plans for MCC Indo team retreat in April (Bali?), and just hung out with each other.

It was at a beautiful green cabin-ish place and I loved the fresh feel. Kudus is pretty muggy, stuffy and hot.

Teaching has been good. It's not easy for sure and my patience gets low at times but I enjoy talking to the students and helping them understand new concepts. I've started making powerpoints and the students like the pictures and I think them reading the bullet points as they hear me speak on them is good for their learning. I teach about 2 classes a day and then spend a couple hours at my desk either talking to the professors, making power points, or talking to students who stop by. There is usually a professor in the class with me and I am technically an assistant. Some classes I only talk for about 40 minutes and other classes I have the whole time. My schedule is strange and not very consistent because the English dept director would like me to visit every class at least once so there is a lot of repeating information and new names to learn but I've started repeating classes a bit so faces are beginning to look familiar and I have started begin able to open up strait with teaching and not a long intro about who I am and what I'm doing at UMK. Starting next week I am meeting with groups of students outside of class a couple times a week and I think that will help with their opening up with me. They tend to be shy in class and that's hard when I'm teaching a class called "Speaking". They're great kids though and I'm looking forward to the rest of the year. The meetings outside of class will allow us to talk about subjects of peace and current events and I'm excited to engage their minds with some critical thinking opportunities.

I'm getting sick of the food here a bit. I'm tired of rice and have started eating mainly either toast or cereal in the morning. Just everyday the same thing is tiring. I feel like the food has many names but much of the same ingredients. Rice, peanut sauce, chicken, meatballs, noodles, broth, sambal. I'd like to start cooking at home more and creating some meals similar to what I'd eat at home. At least once in a while. I'm thinking about biking into town now actually, to buy pasta and Presto sauce and make spaghetti for dinner. It's a bit expensive though.. The pasta is maybe RP 10,000 and the sauce RP 30,000... That's not much in US dollars but when you can get a full meal here for RP7,000, RP 40,000 becomes a lot. Plus I'm not sure if I have enough energy to face the traffic and the stares and the heat.

I've been sleeping a lot and I'm sure if it's because I'm sick and don't know it or if it's the heat starting to wear on me or if it's just normal. I sleep 8 hours a night and often can sleep two hours in the afternoon after school. The heat is just so tiring... I read a lot too. I've read several books and instead of boring you here by listing them, I think I will start a tab on my blog labeled "Books" and review them there. I've been reading random things.. Suspense, romance, memoirs, economics, poetry, modern history, religion... Just a mix of stuff I brought from the US on my kindle and then some from the MCC library. I love reading here. It's super for relaxing and provides an escape for my mind, plus I have time here that I didn't have when I lived in the US. It's crazy.. I will go to school at 7am and stay till noon, and then I might have an activity in the afternoon or at night but then that's all I can handle. My mind can't take any more stimulation than that. It's exhausting, being in these new situations. It's so so great for sure. But all the newness and hyper awareness tires a mind out and there needs to be greater time for rest than when I'm home in my comfort zone. For example I went to school at 7 today and then went home at 12:00. There was a wedding from 1-2 which I went to but then when I got home at 2:30 I was done for the day. Ready to not have anymore activities. I gauge myself.. I want some engagement with people and the culture everyday aside from classes in the morning. So either meeting a friend for baked chicken, going to a church meeting, participating in praise and worship somewhere, going to a wedding, visiting a family...... I don't want to get into the habit of going to school and coming home and reading all day. I could definitely do that but that's not why I'm here.

Because I don't have my art supplies, I think creativity in this time in life will come in the form of words so I decided to start another blog where I will talk about less personal things and more opinions and essays on current events and write some stuff on Indonesia. Hopefully it will be quality and something I can put on my resume. I know I haven't had time to blog much this month so you may be skeptical that I can handle another blog, but I think that if I severely limit my facebook time (which I plan to do anyways... With Thanksgiving and Christmas coming up, my spirit can't take looking at everyone's punkins and family gatherings and bright lights and cozy homes.. Nope, not healthy for me. ) and read a little less I'll have time to journal, blog here, and blog on the new blog. We'll see.

:)

I'm happy and healthy. Missing home a little more often then in past months but excited for Jerica and then my sister to come at Christmas time and before I know it it will be spring then summer again and I'll be saying tearful goodbyes.